The last few months have been a whirlwind, and possibly some of the most unhealthy time I have spent. I've exercised very little and have had to all but force myself to meditate at all. I've worked weird hours and weird days and never once actually felt any real confidence in what I've been doing. I smoke too much, wound up drinking myself sick for the first time in my life and am basically a wreck.
I'm glad it's over. I'm not sorry I did it.
Ashley moved in with me in May, just a month before we needed to move again. Bad planning. And then when we finally did move, it was in to a place that time and circumstances have never really conspired to leave us feeling like we really live here. It was a month before I managed to hang anything much on the walls, we're still lacking some pretty basic furniture, we don't really have a place where anything belongs, least of all us. And now, we're about to leave back to Michigan for a while.
I took a new job at the faire this year, which started less than a week after we moved in to our new place. I had to create a new crew from scratch at a job that I wasn't really sure of the dynamics of. It took me at least half the show to gain any sense that I knew what I was doing and even then I missed a thousand small things and a few big ones. The schedule clash between me and Ashley has been near horrifying and meanwhile the job that sustains me when there isn't a faire in town is way behind, and even though that's no entirely my fault I'm still tired and disorganized enough that I'm having trouble making up the difference.
But then, we made, it didn't we. It's been rough and hard and scratchy and both Ashley and I are bruised and battered by it (I won't go into the things Ashley's got on her plate, that's her story) ands still, we smile at one another through the bruises and say nice things and do nice things and we made it. Not that it's over, not by a long shot, and not that I think it will inherently be easier from here on out, because we're going far away and she'll be confronted and distracted by the novelty of being home but not home and I have a shop to run and a new vehicle to make payments on and really, it's a mess. It's my mess. I don't like it this messy, but it's my mess, and it's our mess and if it were easy, it wouldn't be me.
So we cram in the last few gatherings, some laundry and cleaning, a trip to the hot springs and meanwhile I try and help with the worst of the load for renleather and get the car registered and maybe plated and still we're pulling our hair out, but hey, it's an adventure, right?
Oh, and as for the job, I think I made a few new customers along the way, increased sales enough to pay my wages at least (maybe a little more) and it'll be even better next year, or at least I have the skills to start really building something with the masks and the crew and the shop and Tiffany and Lynn and all.
It has been a rough summer. I'm in terrible shape. I need more duct tape, some string and a long vacation. I get a short vacation and I get to buy my own duct tape and string.
So far the summer seems to be pretty okay.
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